That time of year is once more upon us in the shop, the time of the "Christmas background music". To be honest i don't mind it even after the 3 weeks of it being played over and over again. My favourite is a take off of the Marilyn Munroe classic of "Santa Baby".
Along with the music also comes the "colleagues Christmas Dinner", its not something i have ever attended, it reminds me of too many (army) mess dinners! This years effort is going to be made all the more difficult by the dissolution of the "staff canteen" which if you remember fell upon its sword during October. I overheard one of the managers talking loudly about how they were going to have "instant" this and "microwave" that! this was enough to remind me not to append my name to the list.
The preparation for the "colleagues Christmas Dinner" also caused a bit of a "stir" (no pun intended) the other day. A "meeting" had been convened by the powers that be and went on and on in the infinite details of the dinner. As the managers descended from their meeting the "Mystery Customer" was leaving the store having marked us down (to 92%) for not having some loaf or other out for sale!
This paled into insignificance however from an earlier visit in the week though when we scored a miserable 50%. The store was busy and there not being enough staff to man the checkouts the call went out "all trained colleagues to the checkouts" It was repeated and then repeated again and apparently ignored by everyone. This is classed as a "failure of procedure" and we were marked down accordingly. Mmmmmmmm.
The "not so bright colleague" mentioned in my last blog lets call him "Steven", seems to be surviving although he didn't win any friends when he said to a "fresh" colleague, "I hope none of my friends come in and see me working in this crummy little supermarket". I bumped into another newby down near the cereal isle saying to some old dear "I know they are around here somewhere" I quickly asked him what he was after and he said "toilet rolls". I pointed him and his charge back half way up the shop! at least he's trying!
Now and again you will come across a scrap of paper on the floor and invariably its a scribbled shopping list, e.g loaf, rice, beer. I came across one yesterday which was a bit of a surprise! Carpet Plain. 36" wide (say 1 metre) 8' 9" long (say 2.4 metres!)
Finally then. - - - An old dear approached me, one of the ones I see all the time and after a very short preamble she says, "I'm going for a scan you know". I answer with the usual type of comment in this situation, "oh are you not well then?" "No" she says "I'm alright but the doctor wants me to have me Maturity gland scanned!"
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